Aww, poor sweetheart, both you and your adorable cat. I definitely didn't raise the cats I grew up with, but it hurt like hell to lose them and there are still times when I just sit and remember and miss them so much. But, y'know, I'm happy for the good memories and all that. I hope once the pain subsides a bit you can enjoy your memories too.

I haven't really lost a band that means a lot to me (yet), but I suppose it's not a very different feeling. As with the memories of your cat, the music REM's made isn't going anywhere and you can revisit it whenever you want. It's very sad they won't be making new material (barring a reunion, which I wouldn't call outside the realm of possibility), but that doesn't have to change the good things you get from their music.

Anyway, those are my two cents, such as they are. Let me know if you need to talk sometime, okay? *hugs*